It's a Love Story

When I was fourteen a new kid started going to my youth group. He was a little older than my sister and she was pretty smitten right from the start. She pined, she flirted, she persevered and a few months after he started attending, they were an item.

(July 2003)

I was so very young but I watched as my sister became more and more serious about this boyfriend. Talks of prom carried on to talks of college which turned into talks of apartments and dogs and forever.

When they became engaged July 7, 2007 it was to no one’s surprise but to everyone’s great joy.

One year ago today, July 31, 2008, Jen & Chris stood in a church and made everyone in the congregation sob as we shared in their love and commitment. It wasn’t just a marriage it was a completion, a fulfillment, the end of doubt and loneliness and the beginning of everything. Standing up by my sister was truly a rare experience that made me believe in true love (the forever kind) and gives me hope and faith in my own future.

While it was hard to watch my sister grow away from our childhood and into her beautiful life with her best friend, I couldn’t be happier for them. Plus, I got an incredible brother in the deal.

Happy 1st Anniversary, Jen and Chris. I love you so much!

Confidence not vanity

I think that the majority of women battle with self-esteem and confidence issues at some point in their life. Some more or less than others. While I’ve never had huge self-esteem issues, I am prone to finding more faults than positives when I look in a mirror.

But some days a wonderful thing happens. I glance in the mirror and all of a sudden it’s like—Dang, I’m lookin’ GOOD! It can sneak up on me at any moment. A particularly good hair day when blow drying makes it fall just right and I can’t help but think “Hawt”. Or maybe it’s a day when all of my clothes are fitting nicely and I can’t help but feel fine. You know, like, damn fine.

It’s not that I spend the rest of my time in self-loathing or doubt, no, not at all. But the moments I’m talking about are the ones where you not only feel well put-together and ready to take on the world but where you actually find yourself grinning like a fool and thinking “I am Fan-flippin-tastic!”. These moments make you feel not only good about your looks but everything about yourself. Which you should! You obviously rock!

I think every girl should have and embrace these moments. It’s not vanity, it’s self-assurance, confidence and more importantly it’s a real self-esteem booster.

It doesn’t have to be fueled by looks either. It can be that moment where you’re driving around with your shades on rocking out to a sweet song and you just know you’re the coolest. You know you look ah-ma-zing and you know you live a charmed life. In reality, you might look like a super dork spazzing out and yell-singing along to a tweeny bopper song so loudly that the car next to you can hear it in stereo. (Or is that just me?) It doesn’t matter. If you feel amazing, then you are.

I just want to remind everyone to let themselves have these moments as often as they come and let yourself bask in the glow of feeling good for as long as you can. As my bee-eff-eff Summer would say, “Confidence, Cohen”.

Or should I say, “Confidence, Blog Readers”.

Disclaimer: If you happen to know you’re incredible 24/7 then a big “heck yes” to you, friend, and please feel free to move your awesome self on to the next blog post. Also, teach me your ways. Much love.

Episode 3: Stranded in Alpine

Recently, on “The Desert”…

Jen W. and Katie explored beautiful San Diego, enjoying a little sun and a lot of ice-cream. Way more relaxed and just a little bit more tan than when they arrived, the girls hit the road for the drive back to Border-of-Mexico/Arizona/California, U.S.A. Only, they didn’t get far…

Scene: Exit Ramp to Nowhere

As soon as I realized we were ensconced in an ominous cloud of black smoke I took the nearest exit. Thank goodness Jen W. keeps a cooler head than I do. When I asked her which way I should turn at the end of the exit ramp she wisely, if not a bit hastily, urged me to pull the heck over right where we were.

It’s a good thing I did.

We came to a halt on the edge of the exit ramp and quickly hoped out of the car that was now also popping electrically. Both Jen W. and I looked helplessly at the smoking vehicle for a few moments before she sprang into action and began calling for roadside assistance. Lucky for us a Park Ranger happened to notice our smoking car flying off the highway and had circled around to help us.

Oh yes, he was helpful. He helpfully told us that if we hadn’t have turned the car off right when we did, we would have caught fire. But that’s not all. He also kindly informed us that given the hillside covered with shrubs we parked next to, he said we would have caught the whole hill on fire. Everyone should be thankful you weren’t watching headlines last week about two idiot girls who started the next California Wildfire.

Well, after the ranger left us to wait for the tow truck we did what any sensible stranded automobilists would do. We took a boat load of pictures. And read the “Nancy Drew Handbook” I happened to have with me that taught us all about how to escape from a locked car trunk or survive when your brakes are cut.

(I wasn't going to show you this. I was going to spare you. But I felt it was better than you know the truth: Sister and I are straight up gangster. I pity the fool who thought of messing with us on the roadside.)

Granted, it wasn’t all sunshine and laughter. Jen W. did lash out at the car a time or two.

Scene: Tow Truck to Hell Alpine

Finally, our tow truck arrived to tow us away to the small town of Alpine, California where we would have to spend the night. We’d booked a hotel while we waited (thanks to The Mama who hooked us up with numbers) and anticipated finding the nearest gas station for sustenance when we arrived and then passing out.

But first we had to experience the ride in the tow truck with a man I like to call Ray of Sunshine Tow Truck Driver. I know, long name.

This delightful man decided to tell us many tales. First, when he learned I had a plane to catch back home in 2 days he delved into a 5 minute conversation about plane crashes, especially ones near Denver. He then regaled us with tales of the many stranded travelers who get raped and killed in that area—he mentioned we should hide in the shrubs with a blanket in the future. He also registered his surprise that we hadn’t been raped or killed. Finally, to put the cherry on top, he informed us about the many people who fall victim to being tied up with duct tape and warned us that if we ever get in a car with duct tape or zip ties we will most likely be killed.

We were more than happy to say “peace” to Ray of Sunshine Tow Truck Driver after he dropped us off at our hotel. (“Would you be willing to drop us off at our hotel after you drop the car off?” “Oh of course! I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t and then I heard on the news that you’d been killed” “…Thanks?”) We had a quick conversation with the concierge that went a little something like this:

Katie: Um, would it be safe for us to walk across the parking lot to get food?
Concierge: Safe?
Jen W.: Yeah, we noticed there are restaurants just over there and we wanted to know if it was safe to walk?
Concierge: In Alpine? Of course it’s safe.

She gave us a very strange look. But then, she hadn’t just been in a car with the King of Paranoia.

We were just in time to grab take out at a Chinese restaurant before they closed and then we took a short jaunt to a Rite Aid for some contact solution and blessed shampoo and toothpaste before settling into our room for the night. Thank goodness Jen W. and I are pack rats who had a full cooler and many changes of clothes for a mere day trip to the beach. By the looks of our room you’d think we had planned a vacation to Alpine.

Needless to say, we slept well.

And then we awoke early to embark on a mile long uphill walk to the auto-shop to give them the car keys. It was hot. It was sweaty. But we made it. Now, I had gotten rather weary of pictures at this point so you’ll just have to imagine (and please do) the little auto-shop office we entered. There were about ten placards on the wall with hundreds of kinds of embalmed insects tacked to it for show and jars on the windowsill with some sort of creatures floating in formaldehyde. Jen W. and I disturbingly suspected one was a platypus. Below the insects was a veritable collection of crucifixes and framed pictures of Jesus. Amen.

The walk back to the hotel was a lot easier as it was downhill, but we were still worn out.

Picture it for a minute, will you: 2 tired and sweaty girls with messy hair and not very attractive (or might I add revealing) clothing.

Enter crazy old toothless bike-riding man.

Said bike-riding old guy pedals up to our tired bodies and asks, in his Mexican accent, “Are you working?” with a few suggestive gestures and winks. I have to admit to you, I’m a bit of a naïve one from time to time and so I puzzled my face up and mumbled “working?” It wasn’t until my sister used a few well placed words to send him on his way that I realized, with panic and disgust, what kind of work he hoped we were doing.

Gross.

When we arrived back at the hotel, our hero was only a few minutes behind. Our dearest Mama drove practically all the way to San Diego to rescue her dirty and tired daughters from Alpine. And so off we went…

Back to Arizona. : )

And that, my friends, was my mostly wonderful trip to Arizona! Hope you enjoyed the riveting conclusion to my travel tales.

Episode 2: Sun, Sand and Signs in San Diego

(To read about the first part of my trip to Arizona, go to Episode 1 )


More stories and photos from my trip to visit the bff sister.

After trying to keep cool with many trips for Fro-Yo and dips in a bathwater warm pool, Jen W. and Katie just couldn’t take the heat anymore. With the Mama offering to stay home with the Pups and play cow racing on the Wii, the girls planned a day trip to San Diego. Brilliant.

(I’m going to go ahead and write this episode in first person. Or shall I say I’ll “narrate” the episode.)

Scene: Beach

With a car full of gas, a cooler stocked with ice and plenty of water, and all the appropriate beach gear we were ready to go on our big San Diego adventure. It was only a reasonable three hour drive and so off we went…

…Through three border patrols.

We stopped shortly before the first, thinking it was a toll booth and frantically searching for cash. I bet they thought we looked shady. Who knew they only wanted to ask us if we were U.S. Citizens.






Jen W. was not excited when I proposed I would say “Si” to the next border patrolman who asked. We did learn that one of our check points had seized 3,627 pounds of drugs. Way to go guys! I have a picture of the sign but it’s too blurry so use your imagination. You know, until the episode airs on TV. ; )

We arrived in gorgeous San Diego around 9 am to blue skies and streets full of happily strolling pedestrians. We decided to head first to Coronado and find a beach.

And find one we did. We paid $8 and claimed our spot on the beach before hitting the water. Ok, so only our toes hit the water. That Pacific’s freezing!

(Oops! I forgot to open my eyes on 1-2-3!)

The sand and sun, however, were pleasantly warm and so we happily laid out with books and snacks. The water was gorgeous! It seemed to be sparkling with gold.

We hypothesized a bit that perhaps the sand had been bitten by a Vampire. Mhm. That happened.

Scene: Lunch

Starved from our morning of fervent relaxation, we drove into the beautiful main street of Coronado and found a parking spot. Neither the other-wise talented Jen W. or I had ever learned to parallel park (um, they don’t do that in Colorado?) so we were both super impressed when she pulled off an amazing parking job. It had to be documented.



Ok, so with us a lot of things “have” to be documented.

Like random signs…

(Sassafras St--how amazing is that?!)

And the joy of finding a parking spot after circling the same three or four blocks for about 30 minutes…


Scene: Gaslamp District

But wait. Why would anyone drive around the same few blocks for half an hour just to park? That’s madness!

What you don’t realize is that there was ice-cream involved. Ghirardelli’s ice-cream. Jen W. and I would do anything for some chocolate Ghirardelli’s ice-cream.

Scene: So Long, San Diego

At this point it was nearing 5 o’clock and we were pretty tired. It seemed like time to pack it up and head home to see the lovely Mama and Pups. We gassed up, I took the driver’s seat and we settled in for the drive home. All was well.

That was until I noticed we were encased in a cloud of black smoke that was suspiciously coming from our own car.

To Be Continued…

Episode 1: The Sun Also Rises in the West

Once upon a time, or a week ago, I went to visit my dearest favoritest sister in a place called Border of Mexico/Arizona/California, U.S.A. I went to start building up my guest appearances on her non-existent but fully-formulated reality show “The Desert” so that someday I can become a regular star with my own cheesy entrance music and photo montage during the credits. Important stuff.

Let me introduce you to our characters...

Jen W.: Newlywed and mother to two pups, living out the fab life in an oven small town in Arizona. Hubby dearest is away for a bit doing super hardcore Marine stuff. Thank goodness for Jen’s circle of supporting leads friends who support her with regular trips for Fro-Yo.

The Mama: Do-It-Yourself master and Dog Trainer extraordinaire. Exceptionally lucky good at Yahtzee. Crazy good mother to Jen W. and Katie. Rescuer of stranded travelers.

Katie: Goofy little sis to Jen. Great for navigating unknown cities, self-picture taking and spotting the “Prevent Suicide Hotline” signs next to large and scary bridges.

The Pups: Busy being adorable (and sometimes rather feisty.)

Scene
Katie: Let me take lots and lots of pictures of rocky hills and cacti.

Mama: It baffles me that the sun is setting opposite of the mountains.
Katie: I know it looks so wrong!
Jen W.: Yeah it’s even more confusing to see the sun rise over them.

Observe the Coloradans out of their natural habitat. We’re used to the mountains being to the west.


Scene

Mama quickly passed out with The Pups while Jen W. shows Katie her future room. Much joy is expressed over the décor.

Scene

Late one afternoon, just when Jen W. was about to score a Full House in Yahtzee, the skies in permanently sunny Border of M/A/C darkened. All ran to the window to see if a tornado was coming or perhaps a storm with blessed rain. Instead, they ran outside and were quickly buffed to a shine by a dust storm.

Luckily a nice shower, some Mario Kart on Wii and the deliciousness of bake-them-yourself Tortillas fixed everything right up. And all was well in The Desert.

Tune in Soon for Episode 2 of The Desert: Sun, Sand and Signs in San Diego.

Also, thanks for humoring me. :) I had a blast on my trip to visit The Sis and I'm excited to re-tell our tales.

It was the best of times, It was the worst of times

I'm back in Colorado and already missing my sister very much. But not the heat. 117 degrees? That can't be healthy!

I have this short teaser of my trip to offer you. More coming once I'm well rested again.

While visiting my dearest sister...

We may or may not have dreamed up and acted out dialogue for our reality show "The Desert". It'd be like "The Hills" but less blond, more spunky, and way more random. Also, less awkward pauses and more outbursts of singing. Also, it would take place in the most barren and dusty patch of nowhere as opposed to L.A. Whatever.

My sister may or may not have been so flipping fantastic that she decorated "my room" with a New Moon poster.

We may or may not have fought over kissing Edward on said poster.

We may or may not have taken a delightful day trip to San Diego in which one of us (me) got a freakish splotchy burn on her feet (think reverse farmers tan--pale legs, red feet). We also may or may not have drove around the same block for 40 minutes only so we could find parking and purchase icecream.

We may or may not have broken down on the highway in a cloud of smoke. Which may or may not have led to almost starting the next great California Wildfire.

We may or may not have been mistaken for working girls while walking, dusty and sweaty, to and from the autoshop in small-town-Cali. Oh my.

And if you're guessing that all of these things absolutely did happen, then you're very smart.

Check back for lengthier anecdotes and funny pictures of the trip later.

For now, I'll leave you with this to prove that of course I saw the movie. And just because.

P.S.: I suspect that a certain beloved sister of mine has discovered this tiny slice of the interwebs. I'm pleased as pie about this, aside from the fact that I'm a super dork on the blogs, but if said sister doesn't want me to share some gooftastic pictures she should speak up now. XO.

'Cause there is no Arizona

I’m leaving Tuesday to visit my best friend in Arizona! She also happens to be my sister. I’ve never been to Arizona before and she lives way out in what is apparently the “arm pit” of America. The mom and I are flying out to Phoenix and then road-tripping it out to her little slice of nowhere. Though I’ve tried to mentally prepare myself, I’m not sure I’m ready for the heat. Oh goodness. Can I just pack a bathing suit and walk around in that? I guess that would be a tad scandalous.

I’m looking forward to a week of bonding, catching up and endless sisterly silliness.

(Meeting Elvis Freshmen year)

(Freshmen Move In)

(Silly at The Brown Palace)

I'll be back in a week! Be well.

P.S.: Subject line is from some country song. I know Arizona exists. ;)
P.P.S.: Is it completely inappropriate to greet my sister by asking "Yo Arizona, how you likin' da heat?"

The Boy Who Lived...But Needed Better Style

Back in the day (ok, so like 2000--2007/and/or now) I was really into my boy Harry Potter. Why? Because. Why am I telling you this? Because. I mean it was serious between Harry and me. He helped me get through moving from my home in PA to here in CO. For a while he was my only friend. Then he helped me make new (albeit dorky) friends. It was good times. As so often happens we've both grown up and our lives have gone in different directions. Oh, I mean, we keep in touch but you know how it is. What's there really to talk about after Voldemort's been killed but the weather?

Still, I came upon some of the premiere pictures for "Half-Blood Prince" and I felt those old fangirl tingles. So I'm going to post about it because it's my blog, I'm bored and I feel like it. That's legit, right?


Let's start with a positive...

Emma's dress. I'm sort of in love. She had some unfortunate Paris&Brittany-esque flashing issues due to rain and wind but I sitll think this is gorgeous.

Now for a negative. What happened to Daniel Radcliffe? I never thought he was super attractive, but now he just seems unfortunate. And his height looks painful next to Rupert and Emma.

Now to share some random secrets.

I never liked this:

Or this:

Unpopular opinions, I know, but the truth must be told. I wanted Harry & Hermione to fall in deep Twu Luv myself. Still, I'm looking forward to the movie and hoping they do an acceptable book-to-movie transfer. I've had to let go of my standards a little because nothing equals the books but I still want something of quality.

And finally, what on Earth is going on with girl-who-plays-Lavender? I like a good eclectic style, but this?

Let me point out for your inspection: The hair ribbon. The DIY beaded necklace. The shiny turquois tights. The striped socks. If this is ohmygosh so fashionable and I'm just missing it...well, you can let me know but I'll still say this is ridiculous.

All of these glamorous pictures were snagged from Ohnotheydidn't on Livejournal. There are a bunch more from the premieres if you feel like taking a look.

Good Girl Gone Bad

This song has been stuck in my head today and vaguely relates to the “good girl” theme of this post…just no “going bad”. Thus it has randomly been elected blog subject title.

I was really stressed out driving home from dog-sitting today. Once again I found myself tailed by numerous cars that were unhappy with the speed at which I chose to drive. This happens to me all the time and usually I try to ignore it or beg them telepathically to go around me, but some days I feel really upset by the stress of all the other drivers who are clearly displeased with me.

You see the thing is I don’t like to break the rules. I know this sounds super goody-goody. It’s not that I drive on the dot at 45mph, but I don’t like to push past 48. I know, it’s lame or unusual but it all feeds from the fact that I don’t like breaking rules because I hate getting in trouble. Seriously. Hate it. I would tear up at the mildest scolding from a teacher in high school. “Katie, please be quiet” would have me quivering.

I’m like this in a lot of areas of my life. Of course, not everything I do is based on fear of scolding, but I tend to follow the “good girl” path. Some things, like tending to steer clear of underage drinking, are rule driven. Other life choices I make are driven by my own values and morals. I don’t like to dress inappropriately; I value modesty and sexual chastity; I try not to curse; etc.

Back to the scene in the car: I realized today while driving how difficult it is to follow the rules or to stick to your own standards when everyone around you is breaking them. I like going the speed limit, I have no problem with it—I have no place to be in that much of a hurry. But how do I resist speeding up when I feel the pressure from all around me? The angry glares of the other drivers, the tailing?

I’m not trying to get really deep or anything, but I couldn’t help but apply this to other areas of my life. I like my values and the decisions I’ve made about how to act in my life, but I don’t find myself in a community that’s supportive of that often times. When I don’t want to party-hard on weekends at college, I end up alone (often). When I don’t shed layers and bare skin I don’t get attention from boys and remain single. (I recognize that the boys who would pay attention to that dress code aren’t the ones I want anyway, but it’s still annoying to be invisible. Or it feels like a reminder that it’s hard to find good boys). When I decided how I felt about when it was appropriate to have sex, I made living in the modern, secular world ten times more difficult for myself—I still worry everyday that I’ll never find a guy who will accept me and not pressure me. Where do you even find a guy like that?

I don’t mean this to be disrespectful to any of my friends of the LDS faith, but, honestly, a lot of times I feel that I should’ve been born Mormon because I wouldn’t have to fear finding a community and life that would support my values. Sometimes I’m very jealous of that kind of security of morals. The other day one of my closest friends, who also happens to be LDS, was talking about dating and I commented on how lucky she was to know that a guy wouldn’t expect sex from her and she glowingly agreed that it’s very comforting to her to have that faith and those values in common.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not trying to make it out like I’m a saint or anything. Far from it. I bicker with my dad all the time, I’m impatient with my always loving mother, my sister and I still fight like 16 year olds sometimes, and I can be a pain like no other when I’m in a bad mood. I’m ungrateful too often and I can be short-tempered. And that’s just the spark-notes of the spark-notes of how un-saintly I am. It’s just that I wish I felt more comfortable living the values I find important in the community/world I’m part of.

It’s not easy sticking to your guns when most of the people around you have let loose ages ago.

And this isn’t at all to judge anyone who doesn’t share all of these ideas with me. I know many wonderful and moralistic people who have different lifestyles or ideas and I hold them in the highest esteem as my friends and as people. I’m just speaking personally about how I see my life right now. And in a way, I guess I’m searching. I think what I need more than anything is more confidence so that I feel strong and comfortable to be myself in any environment.

If you’ve read this, I guess you know me a bit better now. I feel a little strange being so heavy and open in this space but I felt the need to share this tonight. In all honestly I'll probably feel awkward about it by the morning and delete it. I hope it hasn’t offended anyone. (Hugs)

Grey skies are gonna clear up

Oh no! I’m feeling sulky and sorry for myself today. And that’s just not ok because:

1.) Nobody likes a mope-r. So not a word. But I bet people like people who make up words more than somebody who is moping.

2.) I don’t like feeling this way either. It’s all storm clouds instead of sunshine and ice cream. Putting aside the fact that I like storms, that is.

3.) I have way too much good in my life to be overcome by self-pity.

So I’m doing what I do when I feel this way. I’m coming up with a contingency plan and turning the day around.

Step 1: Say a prayer and remember all that God has provided in my life that brings me joy. Like a sister who is also my best friend and who I get to visit next week. And cute dogs to dog-sit. And welcoming friends on the internet.

(I'm not Catholic but I still like these prayer beads)

Step 2: Put on my Belle earrings. These are sort of a cross between a good luck charm and that comfortable sweat shirt you wear on rough days. I wear them whenever I have something stressful to deal with—like a test or paper to write—as a sort of luck charm, but I also wear them when I’m having a bad day to cheer myself up.

Step 3: Affix “Chipmunk” bracelet to my wrist. My sister had this engraved for me as a Maid-of-honor/sister present. Chipmunk is her nickname for me and I love this bracelet so much because it’s meaningful but I also thing it’s delicate and pretty. And you can’t see that it says “Chipmunk” unless you know to look so it’s sort of like a comforting secret.

Step 4: Movie Veg out night. Everyone needs one now and then.

…And apparently blogging has taught me that I like to number things. Well, I mean, I am the listing type. Nothing better than scratching something off of a to-do list.

To-Do: Blog

See? ;)